What’s the key to having great sex for life? Touching each other of course! It seems like such a simple thing to say but the fact is, touching is the key which unlocks the door to every single one of your sweetest or wildest fantasies and is the gateway to the kind of intimacy we all need and crave, and mastering how to touch your partner and how they like to be touched is the path to a lifetime of sexual bliss. Sounds pretty intense doesn’t it!

The best lovers I’ve ever had were the ones who took the time to not only stimulate my erogenous zones well, but to touch every part of my body including places which you might not immediately consider to be erotic. The truth is, your entire body can be an erogenous zone and every inch of your skin is erotic. Your skin is your body’s largest organ and it contains millions of nerve endings which are wired directly to your brain, and your brain is responsible for sending those delightful impulses of desire straight to your hot spots!

Everyone likes to be touched, men and women – but for women, touch is so important to sexual arousal and being able to achieve orgasms that without appropriate levels of touch we can often find our sexual experiences less enjoyable. Let’s face it, men and women are different. Guys have it easy (no offense boys) but you do. Men respond to touch fairly quickly and they’re usually ready to go not long after that (and if they’re not, there’s this little blue pill to solve that problem!) – But for women, we need more touching, we need more stimulation, and we need more time.

Most women start to become ‘wet’ within 30 seconds of sexual arousal, but that doesn’t mean we’re ready for sex. Women require a much greater ramp up to get to the point where we’re ready for more, sometimes close to twenty minutes! This is an average estimate, because sometimes we’re hot to go just like the guys are, but in most relationships where the partners have been sharing a bed for a while, we need that extra time. So what’s the problem?

Ask any woman who is in a long term sexual relationship what her biggest complaint in the bedroom is and I’d be willing to bet that she says, “He doesn’t spend enough time touching me” or “He’s always in a rush, it’s over before it starts.” Too often sex can become routine and even a little predictable for many couples, and the first thing to go is usually those slow, quiet, intimate moments you spend touching each other, which are so essential to being able to really connect with your partner.

Not only do women need more time to become aroused, the sexual experience for us is about intimacy first and orgasm second, in that order! I’m not suggesting that women don’t have intensely erotic and sometimes dark and twisted fantasies and desires of our own (we do, trust me), but we also need in addition to everything purely sexual, the subtle transcending intimacy which comes from just being touched by our lover’s hands and the ‘feelings’ which come from those hands on our body.

So how can couples bring touch back into their bedrooms? A great product for such sensual pleasures is the Kama Sutra Massage Therapy Kit. This kit comes with five 50 milliliter vials of some of the best massage oils I’ve ever used with amazingly stimulating scents such as Sweet Almond, Serenity, Healing Blend, Soaring Spirit, and my personal favorite, Pleasure Garden! They come in a very convenient zipper bag for storage and easy access and each vial has a quick and easy flip top dispenser. Kama Sutra says about this:

“According to the age-old art of massage, lovers hold great powers within their hands. To relax, to rejuvenate, to arouse; all through the subtlety of a simple touch. Each of these five intensely aromatic massage oils helps release one of your hidden powers.”

There is such truth in this statement. If you stop for a moment to think about it, you reach for your lover with your hands, you hold them with your hands, you touch them and express your love and desire for them through your hands - so touch and touching should be the most important thing you can do with and for each other, because after all, making love is about showing and expressing your deepest, most powerful and intensely personal feelings for another human being.

I’ve been using the Kama Sutra oils for a while now, and they’re delightfully silky and they make you feel so elegant when they’re applied to your skin and when your lover massages the luxurious oil all over your body. They truly do ‘release’ that fantastically sensual and sexual creature which lives inside each and every one of us!

Be aware though that these are not sexual lubricants and shouldn’t be used as such. These oils are meant to be applied to your skin by your lover and then let your hands and your imaginations run wild!

One of my favorite ways to use these oils is to have my lover lay down completely naked on their belly and just relax and get comfortable. A little goes a long way with these oils so start with a few drops on your hands or directly onto their skin, you can always add more as you need. I then spread the oil with my hands across their back, paying special attention to the neck and shoulder area, and then working down along the spine to the lower back. You can feel the tension rushing away from their body as you do this. I then like to pay special attention to the lower back around the Sacrum and the Coccyx, and then working the muscles of the buttocks and the hips. I then work my way down along the back of each leg, massaging all of the muscles, especially the calves, leaving my lover’s body in a heavenly state of relaxation and bliss, but also completely filled with energy! (This of course translates into some good loving for me!)

I enjoy receiving the same kind of massage as well, but I also like to have my belly and abdomen massaged, as well as my breasts and collarbone area. These aromas drift into your consciousness and bring forth intense feelings of arousal and the desire to keep touching!

The beautiful thing about massage and the Kama Sutra Massage Therapy Kit is that anyone can use this and benefit from it. Both men and women can enjoy these, and it encourages more touching which is not only good for your sex life, it’s good for your soul too. You don’t have to be an expert massage therapist to use them either; you just need to have a pair of hands and someone to touch.

The Kama Sutra Massage Therapy Kit is a fixture in the Lazy Geisha’s bedside sex basket and I would encourage all of you to make it part of yours and to touch each other!