Zen and my Mother-in-law
Something a little lighter tonight to help ease you into the weekend since I’ve recently loaded up on you with heady issues like domestic abuse and the war on dildos, plus a shot of amusement with stories about my lesbian neighbors just to keep things interesting. I finally got outside this afternoon to do some planting. The last few weeks have been tough emotionally, especially after the miscarriage and then trying to get caught up with work stuff, so I haven’t really had much of a chance to plant my flowers and tend to my gardens until today.
I’ve begun to understand why I find such spirituality in simple things like gardening. There’s a certain zen about the planting and care of gardens, especially flower gardens. Over the last few weekends my husband turned over the flower beds and worked some organic material into the soil to get them ready for me. I like to dig my own holes even tho he always offers to help. There’s just something about getting your hands into the soil and feeling the dirt between your fingers. I find it completely relaxing, almost eliciting a meditative state where my mind is set free from the worries and pressures of the world. Then the caring of them and watching them grow and bloom into the most beautiful and unique flowers; plants with a dizzying array of colors and scents to delight the senses and inspire the soul.
So, today I planted an assortment of dahlias, a variety of impatients, petunia, marigolds, and four new rose bushes; then I spread red cedar mulch around all the beds and watered. I absolutely swear by miracle grow! It’s the best plant food and I’ve always had amazing success with my flowers every year since I stared using it. The window boxes on the front of my house are filled with petunias and every year they grow so much that they turn into vines, hanging down almost two feet out of the window boxes and they’re completely filled with blossoms. They take time to grow but by the fall they’ll be brilliant. I usually just do annuals, but I’m thinking I might want to try some bulbs this year. Maybe some tulips. But I’m most excited about the rose bushes. Those will take time, but I went with an American Rose variety which do very well in my New England climate. So… that’s my zen. When things start to grow and bloom, I’ll take some pictures and post them.
I got a call from my mother-in-law today who wants to come visit us for a week or two over the summer, which is fine, I guess. I actually get along pretty well with my mother in law, tho we’ve had a few disputes over the years, but since she’s actually responsible for my husband and I reconciling over Christmas 2005, I have to more or less keep my mouth shut. She wants to come up here and rent a cottage on the beach, maybe in Narragansett or Newport or maybe on Cape Cod where we can all go and hang out for a little vacation. We haven’t set a date yet but I think it will probably happen.
My husband often tells me that I’m a lot like his mother, which I suppose I should take as a high compliment! I wonder if it’s true that men seek out a companion that reminds them of their mothers. Psychologists tell us that both men and women seek out partners who are like their parents; men look for a woman like their mother and vice versa, we look for men like our fathers. It might be true because Jeff is in many ways a lot like my own father; very principled and honorable, and who is very deferential towards women, just like my Dad was. My husband certainly isn’t perfect, but I’ve managed to change some of his more impulsive ways. He used to be a “Kill ‘em all and let god sort ‘em out” kind of guy, always convinced that he was right and knew better, but now I’ve managed to at least get “Shoot now, ask questions later” kind of behavior out of him, so I suppose he’s mellowed a bit, but I keep asking myself how I’m like his mother. He tells me that my independence and confidence are a lot like his own mother, and I suppose that’s true, but you know, the real secret about us is even tho we may be able to put on a strong front, we’re almost always not as strong as you think we are. Sometimes the circumstances of life force us to be stronger for everyone.
So what else?
Apple has released the Safari browser for Windows users! Yay! You know, there’s a much larger strategy here on the part of Apple I think. Steve Jobs said recently about iTunes that “giving windows users iTunes was like giving glasses of ice water to people in hell…” He was so right! But I’m thinking that by making Apple software available for windows users, Jobs is betting that after they see the beauty and elegance of Apple software, users will also make the switch to Apple hardware too. And rightfully so! (and get an OhMiBod too!)
And it’s June and the Red Sox are starting to suck again, just like they do every year. I can’t even talk about this it’s so bad. Josh Beckett gave up a solo home run and a grand slam to the Colorado Rockies… and well, there goes my Beckett Blowjob Fantasy right over the Green Monster too. Oh well. Your loss Josh… I’m really good.
I’ve actually felt like writing more lately which I suppose is a good thing. Writing, like gardening, is another zen for me. My emotional attachment to my words and my thoughts used to be a private endeavor before I discovered blogging. There are many things I write which I never publish, maybe because they’re too intimate or too private to share. I think those who write from their hearts do have an emotional connection with their words, and sometimes it’s a little scary to share such things. A writer can reveal their soul thru words, and it can be intimidating to be so naked, but, I’ve been working on some things which are just about ready to be shared; the next part of this, and something I wrote a long time ago here is begging for a next chapter, so there are some darkly sexual and interesting things lined up in the world of geishaland. But I also believe that you can’t rush them either. It’s like the garden. The writer plants the seed and the idea grows until it’s ready to bloom, and only then can we appreciate the beauty of the flower.
I’m just waiting to grow.
I found some white New Guinea Impatients and some Figaro Dahlias which are multi-colored. Now I just need to keep my husband away from the rose bushes! Years ago when he was out working in the yard with his hedge clippers one day, he decided to “trim” one of my rose bushes! (Oh no!!) and it of course died within days! He’s learned to leave my garden alone since then! But this particular rose bush used to be right next to the pool and when it would lose its petals, they would fill the pool and float on top across the water! It was so beautiful! But, that was in our old house years ago. Oh well.
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