Make Me Feel Like a Woman
This joke was sent to me by Terry of A Little More Passion, one of our many Butterfly Angels and a good friend to geishaland. It rung so true that I just had to share.
Thanks sweetie! Humor is so often the best medicine in the entire world! :w00t:
Make Me Feel Like a Woman
On a transatlantic flight, a plane passes through a severe storm. The turbulence is awful and things quickly go from bad to worse when one of the wings is struck by lightning. One woman in particular completely loses it.
Screaming hysterically, she stands up in the front of the plane – “I’m too young to die” she wails. Then she yells, “Well… if I’m going to die, I want my last moments on earth to be memorable! Is there anyone on this plane who can make me feel like a WOMAN !?”
For a moment there’s silence. Everyone has forgotten their own peril. They all stare, riveted, at the desperate woman at the front of the plane.
Then a cowboy from Oklahoma stands up in the rear of the plane. He’s tall, handsome, well built, with dark brown hair and hazel eyes. He starts to slowly walk up the aisle towards her, unbuttoning his shirt…
one button at a time….
No one moves…
He removes his shirt…
Muscles ripple across his chest…
She stares at him with hungry eyes and gasps….
He whispers…
“Iron this and get me a beer…”
1Mike
wrote on 13 September 2007 at 6:44
Hey Nina!
it’s been awhile. That was great! Had to take time off, things have been really hectic, work, sons football, red sox, patriots and college ball….very busy…hope all is well. I’ve got a lot of reading to catch up on…take care
Mike
2Terry
wrote on 13 September 2007 at 7:17
Yeah, story of my life, right ladies? But I still love ‘em!
3JW
wrote on 13 September 2007 at 9:08
That was a good one Nina. ;)
A man walks to the corner of Oxford Street and Regent Street in London during a downpour and somehow manages to get a taxi straight away.
He gets into the taxi and the cabbie says “Perfect timing. You’re just like Stevie.”
“Who?” says the man.
“Stevie Jones. He was a guy who did everything right. Like my taxi being vacant during a rainstorm. It would have happened like that for Stevie.”
“Well no one’s perfect. There’s always a few clouds over everybody,” the man replies.
“Not Stevie,” says the cabbie. “He was a terrific athlete. He could have turned professional at golf or tennis and he danced like a West End star. He was handsome and sophisticated, more than George Clooney. He had a better body than Arnold Schwarzenegger in his prime. He was something! Somehow Stevie just knew exactly how to make women happy,” the cabbie continues, “He had a memory like a computer. Could remember everybody’s birthday. He could fix anything. Not like me. I change a fuse and the whole street blacks out.”
“No wonder you remember him!” says the man.
“I never actually met Stevie,” admits the cabbie.
“Then how do you know so much about him?” asks the man.
“After he died, I married his wife.”
4Musns
wrote on 13 September 2007 at 11:55
Thank God for humor, not sure how I’d get through stressful times without it.
Thank you - timing couldn’t be more apt!
5hapes
wrote on 13 September 2007 at 23:07
WHISPERS “iron this and get me a beer”? Oh please, a REAL man would yell it from his lay-z-boy in the living room!
6nina aoki
wrote on 14 September 2007 at 0:02
Hi Mike!
You’ve been missed! I’m glad you liked my joke! I’ve been known to have a wicked sense of humor you know!
Oh please, don’t get me going about the Red Sox! It’s mid September and New York is 5 1/2 games back out of first behind Boston going into the series at Fenway this weekend! Yay! Tho I expected Detroit to be closer in the wildcard race. If things hold, I think the Red Sox are going to win the division and will host Cleveland at Fenway in the playoffs, which puts the Yankees (if they win the wildcard) in Anaheim to face the Angels! And I think the Angels will take that series and knock NY out of it. Tho, I’m concerned about a matchup between the Angels and the Red Sox. That will be a tough series if it gets to that point, but that’s how it looks right now. After this upcoming series with the Yankees this weekend, the rest of Boston’s schedule is a cakewalk! So I’m really excited! Having a 5 1/2 game lead over the Yankees this late in the season is fantastic!
Then there’s the Patriots. It’s really embarrassing what’s happened, but you also have to consider the animosity and outright hatred between New England and the Jets. (I fucking hate the Jets!) The Patriots are really getting hit hard by Goodell over this videotaping thing. I’m not saying that what the Patriots did wasn’t wrong, but I don’t think they’re the only team guilty of this infraction and it seems to me that this is a lot of whining on the part of Eric Mangini as an excuse for his team’s lackluster performance last Sunday. Tho I think Belichick should have been more careful and should have expected Mangini to rat him out.
Stealing signals is an aspect of all professional sports… tho in baseball, if you get caught stealing signals or giving away position, expect a fastball to be thrown at your head the next time you’re up at bat!
Well you catch up sweetie!
xoxo,
nina
7nina aoki
wrote on 14 September 2007 at 0:07
Terry,
Yeah! No kidding right! :silly:
I can’t even tell you how many times Jeff has given me that ” Will you iron my shirt…? ” look first thing in the morning as he’s getting ready for work! And I mean, I haven’t even had a cup of tea or barely had time to wake up and he’s handing me his shirt! The nerve!
But… yeah, can’t live without him, you know? :biggrin:
Thanks sweetie!
xoxo,
nina
8nina aoki
wrote on 14 September 2007 at 0:11
JW,
lol! Very cute sweetie, or is that Stevie?
xoxo,
nina
9nina aoki
wrote on 14 September 2007 at 0:11
Musns,
You’re very welcome sweetheart! I’m glad it helped you out! :kissing:
xoxo,
nina
10nina aoki
wrote on 14 September 2007 at 0:12
hapes,
Ah! A real man huh? lol!
Thanks!
xoxo,
nina
11hapes
wrote on 14 September 2007 at 1:16
Two comments:
1> I’m not sure, but it seems like you’re a Yankees fan? If so, I’m gonna have to unbookmark you :):)
2> As far a being a REAL man, uh, it ain’t me. I mean, I don’t drink beer, I actually occasionally pay attention to my wife, and …well, I got nothin’.
12nina aoki
wrote on 14 September 2007 at 1:21
hapes,
1) ME? A YANKEES FAN?? BLASPHEMY! My heart lives on Yawkey Way baby! Jeter sucks, A-Rod swallows! Or is that A-Rod sucks, Jeter swallows? hahaha! Convinced now?
“Having a 5 1/2 game lead over the Yankees this late in the season is fantastic!”
2) lol! Okay, I’ll let you slide this time!
xoxo,
nina
13Alexa
wrote on 14 September 2007 at 15:00
Oh Nina,
I am laughing my ass off!!!! I would have jumped him before he got all the way down the aisle but better he did cuz, not ironing!!!!!
still laughing!!!!!!!
cheers
XX’s
14JW
wrote on 14 September 2007 at 17:46
The practice of putting women on pedestals began to die out when it was discovered that they could give orders better from there. — Betty Grable
15nina aoki
wrote on 14 September 2007 at 23:22
Hi Alexa!
lol! I know, I laughed for an hour myself! It kind of hits us right where we live right?
Oh yes, I checked out your official site today! I was most impressed!
Thanks!
xoxo,
nina
16nina aoki
wrote on 14 September 2007 at 23:23
JW,
lol! I’ve always thought so! :biggrin:
xoxo,
nina
17hapes
wrote on 15 September 2007 at 1:46
Dang, that’s what I get for not reading the whole comment. My bad. I’m from Pittsburgh, where the local major league baseball team plays worse than my kid’s little league team. So, I root for the Sox, coz why not?
18nina aoki
wrote on 15 September 2007 at 12:37
hapes,
lol! You’ve got to pay attention to the fine print! But after Boston blew last night’s game against the Yankees, I’m about ready to jump off the Tobin Bridge!
Grrrrr!!! I HATE THE YANKEES! :sick:
Thanks tho… I wouldn’t want to root for the Pirates either!
xoxo,
nina
19Alexa
wrote on 15 September 2007 at 15:01
I’m glad you moseyed over there because after Monday, the site is going down…have to retire it for a while…who knows how long…;-) I even pulled off my news posts and photos so, you saw a smaller version of it.
Thanks again for the joke!!!!!
20nina aoki
wrote on 16 September 2007 at 17:29
Hi Alexa!
Oh I’m sorry! Nothing bad I hope! Please email me and let me know what’s going on with you! :kissing:
xoxo,
nina
21Alexa
wrote on 16 September 2007 at 17:55
Nothing bad that is for sure…just that I am retiring from the business possibly for good… ;-) We’ll see. Things have gone from zero to sixty in less than no time flat and I find it all very exciting! I plan on blogging and who knows, things may not work as well and I’ll be back online.
Cheers my dear!!!!!
XX’s
22nina aoki
wrote on 17 September 2007 at 2:16
Hi Alexa!
Oh I’m glad that it isn’t anything bad! I’ll still continue to read your lovely blog tho! We’ll have to chit chat about how this whole ‘leaving’ thing works out for you! :kissing:
xoxo,
nina
23Simply Alexa
wrote on 17 September 2007 at 19:50
Nina - we definitely have to chat about “retiring”….;-)))
24nina aoki
wrote on 18 September 2007 at 8:38
Hi Alexa!
Oh yes, absolutely!
xoxo,
nina