over morning tea: love monkeys attack Maine school district… Darwin taken hostage!
Something from the But this isn’t Kansas Dorothy! file; a new front in the war against teaching evolution in public schools has broken out in the great state of Maine – a state known for its pristine shoreline, fabulous lobster, and giving birth control pills to 12 year olds, can now add ‘enemy of Darwin’ to the list. An article here in the Boston Globe reports that some guy named Matthew Linkletter, who happens to be the director of some school district there, is trying to use a backdoor method to push the teaching of evolution out of the science curriculum.
See – and this is what happens to people when they find Jesus; science all of a sudden becomes a theory. And to think I wanted to start the week with something light too… sighs 
Creationism isn’t and can’t be taught in public schools – because that would fuck up that whole separation of church and state thing we like to pretend exists in this country – but the fundamentalist science hating bible thumping Christians have come up with another approach to getting rid of that pesky “evolution thing” which goes something like this:
“Fine. Can’t teach creationism in public schools? Well, we’ll just call evolution a theory and you damn kids won’t get any science then! How ya like me now, bitches?”
It’s completely transparent and stupid, but that never seems to get in the way of the Christians now does it?
I don’t want to pick on anybody’s personal beliefs here, but isn’t that the whole point? It’s your personal beliefs. Why can’t you keep your god and your beliefs in your home and your church and leave the nice science teachers alone? Tho it never seems to work out that way does it?
From the Boston Globe article:
Linkletter’s pastor, Roy Blevins of Church of the Open Bible in Athens, favored a suggestion from SAD 59 Chairman Norman Luce that a philosophy class might provide a better forum for the study of evolution.
“That’s a sane approach,” Blevins said. “The evolution concept is a theory, and not provable. If the science department at Madison High is simply teaching theory, then you ought to leave it in the science department.”
Madison Town Manager Norman Dean, who taught science in Madison from 1962 through 1996 and once taught Linkletter, characterized his former student’s proposal as “absolutely stupid.”“I thought we already had the monkey trial,” he said, referring to the 1925 Scopes trial in Tennessee that tested a law banning the teaching of evolution.
Well – we did have the monkey trial, and the monkeys won.
Speaking of missing links and killer coding monkeys – I’ve been playing with SETI@Home with my Ubuntu workstation – using up all of my unused computer cycles and my mad Unix command line skillz to help search the galaxy for ET, just in case Fox Moulder was right and the missing link in the human genome is actually an alien race which just showed up on earth one fine day and they happened to notice some Bonobo Monkeys fucking in the trees and decided to join in. In case you didn’t know – the Bonobo is often referred to as the Hippie Monkey or the Love Monkey because they’re always having sex.
About the Bonobo Monkey
Sexual intercourse plays a major role in Bonobo society, being used as a greeting, a means of conflict resolution and post-conflict reconciliation, and as favors traded by the females in exchange for food. With the exception of a pair of Congoese gorillas caught in the act, Bonobos were thought to be the only non-human apes to have been observed engaging in all of the following sexual activities: face-to-face genital sex (most frequently female-female, then male-female and male-male), tongue kissing, and oral sex. More recently, however, gorillas have been observed to engage in face-to-face sex. In scientific literature, the female-female sex is often referred to as GG rubbing or genital-genital rubbing.
Hmmm, sounds like evolution to me babe! 
— but by all means… please feel free to believe that snake, apple, tree, fig leaf and ‘blame the woman for all your problems’ fairy tale if that’s what you want to do. Your kind will be filtered out of the gene pool eventually – unless of course you’re a Duggar
Enjoy your Monday!
Cheers to evolutiion.
I was taught all about Darwin and his explorations into evolution at my Church of England school….along with all the Bible stories and Christian stuff….how I love the irony…(when the curious of us questioned the creation/evolution conflict the explanation given was that SOME Old Testament stuff was actually stories and fables…well that was enough to make this curious gal think that maybe the whole lot was just a story…..)